Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Thumbs....Part #1

Have you ever really thought about how incredible our human thumbs are? They really do separate us from animals in a lot of ways. The past 2 days I have felt like an animal....incapable of a bazillion everyday things, without the proficient use of my left thumb. 

On Monday night, while working on a bookbinding project for class, I was just going about my business, cutting paper, binders board, etc. While using my reliably sharp exacto knife, my thumb slipped from the ruler right as I sliced, and I ended up slicing about 3/8" of the end of my thumb almost completely off.....gross I know. Good thing my fingernail got in the way or I probably would've cut all the way through my thumb. The picture below doesn't quite do it justice. I was bleeding, a lot. 


My dear sweet friend Brannon happened to be at my apartment when it happened and promptly offered to take me to the ER. I looked at it for about a minute, debating whether or not I could just super-glue it. After applying lots of pressure, then taking the towel off and seeing the flap of skin dangling, and the blood continuing to squirt, I decided the ER was probably a good idea.

So we went, and waited. While waiting, there was a kid sitting next to us in the waiting room, holding a bloody rag to his mouth. It was pretty bloody. A friendly girl who seemed to be waiting for a friend to come back out of the ER, offered donuts. This little boy ( appx. age 5) couldn't resist. So we laughed heartily as this kid held his bloody rag to one side of his mouth, and ate a big sugary donut with the other half. Boys + donuts....

We finally went back to a bed and the nurse gave me about 5 shots at the base of my thumb, swelling it to literally 2 times its normal size, it was disgusting, and was super painful. I wanted to gag as I watched my normally skinny thumb swell to an overstuffed sausage sized thumb. Gross and gross. 



Then the doc finally came, sewed up my finger, and sent me on my way. I now officially have a new thumbprint. And I feel completely incompetent, like a newborn. I can hardly do anything. My next post will be about the adventures of all the things you need 2 thumbs to accomplish smoothly. The list is getting quite long. Typing, surprisingly, is not one of those things. You only need 1 thumb to type well. 


Friday, March 26, 2010

A Moment of Truth

Sometimes in life we have those "aha" moments. Some are just times when you finally get something really simple, or when a statistics principle finally makes sense, or when you're the last one to finally get the joke.



But then occasionally, there are the true "aha" moments, when God literally pours down His light and knowledge,  in small but extremely significant ways and truly enlightens us. He enlightens our minds, literally meaning that things that were not known before are now known, understanding is given about things that were once completely unclear, or misunderstood. Those, my friends, are beautiful moments.

I had one of those moments tonight. I won't go into details, they're not important for you. But isn't it just amazing when that happens? It's hard to really put it into words, but I'm grateful that it happened. I needed His understanding and knowledge and grace, and He willingly gave according to HIS timetable, when He was ready to give it...not according to my timetable. It's such evidence to me of how much He loves me, and how intimately aware He is of me, my life, and of ALL of His children. 






I don't mean to get preachy by any means. It was just a really good night, and I'm grateful for God's love, patience, and presence in my life.  If you've experienced this, you know what I mean, and you know that you can't really describe it sufficiently with any words. 


That's it, that's all. It's 3:33am, and I need to get to sleep. Goodnight friends.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Let the countdown begin......

So my excitement for blogging didn't last super long. I was determined to be good about writing regularly - not that I've gone a long time, in fact it probably has only been about a week or something. I'm just so busy and my life is so insane that I've lost my drive for just about everything, because I'm trying to do too much.

However, today is the day that the countdown begins. Graduation is exactly one month from today. That's right folks - this girl is finally (cross your fingers and pray for me really hard!) going to graduate from college!!!! I'm doing a little dance in my room, literally. Ask Megan for a demonstration sometime, she does the dance best.

I guess that's all for tonight. 30 days.

Oh, and I sat on the 3rd row at the Jazz game on Saturday night, next to a very handsome, very nice, very funny boy. It was awesome.

Sweet dreams. Saldziu sapnu. Spoky noky.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Aisku

Atrodo kad as blogis zmogus....bent darbe. Sia savaite as issuncia elektronina laiska zmonems darbe apie klausimus kurios daug zmoniu daznai prase manes. Tada galvojau kad butu gerai tik rasyti visiems apie tuos klausimus. Bloga ideja, zodziu. Kodel suagusai neveikia taip? Kodel as dabar bloga policinika??? Nu.....as trupuciuka pikta si vakara. Tai yra kodel as rasau Lietuviskai...nes niekas skaite mano blog kuris kalba LT.
Tai viskas. As jauciu blogai. As lb lb pavargusi, ir si vakara "as pikta ant pasaulio..."
Oij man reikia miegoti. As ne savimi.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

My Blog's Title

So, for any of you readers out there (maybe the 3 of you who actually read this), if you're not familiar with  Jane Austen, which I'm pretty sure most of you are...but just in case you're not, I'll briefly inform you. The title of my blog, "Run mad as often as you choose, but do not faint!" comes from Jane's book, Mansfield Park. The main character, Miss Fanny Price, is quite the writer, both of novels and letters. That is one of my favorite things that she says, one of her quotable quotes if you will.

Well, I chose that as the title of my blog, because it's quite descriptive of my life right now, as has been mentioned in several previous posts. One day I thought, maybe I should just cut back on blogging, that would save me a little time. But I just can't. In reality, I don't spend any time reading blogs right now (sorry friends!), and I only post a couple times a week, which means I only spend about a half hour a week blogging. And that half hour investment is well worth the therapeutic rewards that it returns.

 So tonight, I come to you with just my thoughts on life and a rundown on this past week/weekend.

1st - I hate daylight savings in the springtime. As if I don't get enough sleep as it is?

2nd - Speaking of sleep, I run mad all week long, then on Sunday when I'd love to try and get caught up on homework (I know, I know, I should try and be more righteous), my body goes into full-on absolute rejection mode, not allowing me to do anything but make it to church, then sleep for 5 hours, no matter how hard I try to do anything else. Today for example, I sat down to read a book that I'm studying for my research paper (which btw, the rough draft was due last Monday...hahaha!), read for a bit, and woke up 4 hours later with my face in a pile of drool on my pillow and my book on the floor next to the couch. My body feels like it's sick every Sunday, but then somehow on Monday morning it's ok and goes full force for another week.

3rd - this weekend was insane, but great. The benefit concert and comedy show ran smoothly and we had a great turnout at both performances. But I can't even tell you how glad I am that they are over. Only 3 weeks left of this internship... it's been awesome, amazing, and I've learned a lot, but I'm exhausted.

4th - I'm still in the middle of that silly research paper...but I decided after getting through 2 more pages to take a break and just exhale here on my blog. I'll be back to writing about childhood obesity soon.

5th - I love and care deeply about a boy. I hate it. I hate it because he will never love me back or care about me the way I do about him. That's possibly one of the worst feelings in the world.Yuck. I'm trying to just get over it. And maybe the problem is that I love a boy. I need to find a man to love. And if he's reading this (which is 99.9999% unlikely), well, I guess I don't know what I'd say if he was reading this. He already knows I still care about him, but he's definitely not making it easy to move on......gggggrrrrrrrrrr. Like last night when he not only drove home the dancing Little Caesar's lady at 12:30am, he also took her bag from her, opened her door, gave her the seatbelt and then shut her door for her, and put her bag in the backseat. I'll be she's never had a nice young man do that for her. Or how he spent approximately 2 hours cleaning our venue before the concert and comedy show, without being asked......I repeat, gggggrrrrrrrrr. Such is life.

6th - I'm doing a 23-day awful carbs-and-everything-that-is-good-in-life detox....self starvation and deprivation. All I want right now is a big cup of ice cold milk and one of the delicious looking brownies sitting on our counter. Down 3 pounds, 4 days in, only 19 days to go. Ugh.

On the thought of food, that is all for now. Back to childhood obesity and regurgitating other peoples research, like this is supposed to be some sort of incredible learning experience. Bogus, yes, with a capital B.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

March MICROFINANCE Madness!!!!

Check this out! Again, this is for my internship...for an amazing cause! And guess what, Team BYU is IN THE LEAD!!! We're having a March Madness challenge, so get in on the action today! Check out http://www.vittana.org today to learn more.

ALSO ~ Events this weekend:

Acoustic Benefit Concert - Friday March 12, The Lift @ Alpine Village (1366 N. Freedom Blvd. Provo)
9pm-12am(ish)

Benefit Comedy Show - FUNN-E Comedy Troupe, Saturday March 13, The Lift @ Alpine Village
9:30-11pm

More info at byuvittana.blogspot.com, or check out our group on facebook, called "BYU Vittana"

Tell your friends, post it on your blog, tweet it, facebook it.....thanks for the love, and thanks for reading!

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Something's Gotta Give

It's official. I'm trying to do too much.

Something's gotta give. I can't keep going at this rate much longer.

So the problem is...what do you do when you can't cut anything out? Everything that I'm working on, I can't just cut back on any of them. School is usually the first thing that gets put on the back-burner. That is ok for the most part, I'm quite content this semester as long as I pass and graduate 6 weeks from now. But until then, how do I handle all of it, every       single         day? I already don't sleep, don't eat, and don't take care of myself.

Any suggestions? Please enlighten me. Because I can't cut back on work, I can't cut back on my internship, I can't cut back any more than I already have on school. Something's gotta give.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

BYU-Vittana.....DON'T MISS THIS!

Ok, this will be the first of many posts about Vittana. I know you're dying to know what it is, but I'm not going to tell you tonight. I'll just say that we had a fantastic evening at our booth at the NGO Fair at the Hunger Banquet.

To learn more, visit both byuvittana.blogspot.com  and  vittana.org . This is an incredible, simple idea that is attacking a huge problem.



Social entrepreneurship uses business principles to revolutionize industries, make large-scale changes and challenge fundamentally inequitable systems! It takes one step at a time, by people like you and me. I know we don't always feel like we can have a big hand in making a difference to worldwide social issues like hunger, poverty, etc. but we can!!!!!! So go check out the websites to learn more about Vittana, and how YOU CAN HELP!

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Just Can't Sleep Tonight

Just can't sleep tonight,
Something isn't right.

Deep down I know,
that the pain will go,
and time will heal the wounds.

But right now it hurts.
Right now it aches
and causes me to shake.

Just want my favorite bear hugs,
and my heart still tugs,
how long will this continue to bug?

Just can't sleep tonight,
something isn't right -
cuz you're not holding me tight.

Monday, March 1, 2010

"In This World it's Hard to Get it Right..."

My roommate, Sue-bear, recently introduced me to Ingrid Michaelson's music...which I actually already knew a bunch of her stuff, just didn't know her name. So, tonight, this post covers a lot of my feelings as of late, but they're all lyrics from a bunch of her songs. Enjoy, and thanks Ingrid!

- The storm is coming, but I don't mind.
People are dying, I close my blinds.
All that I know is I'm breathing now.
I want to change the world.

- I have fallen down again tonight
In this world it's hard to get it right.
Trying to make your heart fit like a glove
What it needs is love, love, love.

-Have I taken a wrong turn?
When will I learn? When will I learn?
Should I show them all my scars?
If I look to my right, will I see the one I fight for?
Or if I turn to my left, will I see that I have kept my heart locked up, locked up so tight?
Love is everywhere, but not a drop for me to drink.
Tie me up and bind my feet.
Drop me in and watch me sink.

- Happy is the heart that still feels pain.
Darkness drains and light will come again.
Swing open your chest and let it in.
Just let the love, love, love begin.

- I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok.
I just want to be ok today.
I just want to feel today, feel today,
I just want to feel something today.

- Open me up and you will see I'm a gallery of broken hearts.
I'm beyond repair. Let me be, and give me back my broken parts.
Just give me back my pieces, just give them back to me please.
Just give me back my pieces and let me hold my broken parts.

- Have you ever thought about what protects our hearts?
Just a cage of rib bones and other various parts.
So it's fairly simple to cut right through the mess,
And to stop the muscle that makes us confess.
And we are so fragile, and our cracking bones make noise.
And we are just breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys.